Thursday, January 26, 2006

jack...

it's been nine years today since one the greatest people i have ever met died tragically. it's hard to believe that so much time has passed... i remember it all too vividly. he was truly a special person who i will never forget. he was a brother, a friend, and the greatest clown prince that ever lived...so, here's to jack geitner, and long may you be remembered. no one could wear that scooby-doo hat like you my friend....

Monday, January 23, 2006

guinea pig...

so, i leave today to begin four days of medical trials. i am quite looking forward to it. i get to sit on my arse for a few days reading and writing, and i get paid for it. i might start another blog for recording my activities during the trials so you can all keep up with what goes on. i hope i am intact when i am released on friday - no extra arms, ears, or fuck forbid an extra mouth... no, it will be good. i am testing a new drug for diabetes. this will be my first major good deed of the year... though it's more for the financial benefit than for the poor souls with diabetes... anyway, i shall return soon with some stories to tell... check out my journal...

Sunday, January 22, 2006

the master...

- political language...is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind -

- if liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear -

- many people genuinely do not wish to be saints, and it is possible that some who achieve or aspire to sainthood have never had much temptation to be human beings -

- every generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it -

- speaking the truth in times of universal deceit is a revolutionary act -

george orwell

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

god...

this question of 'god' seems to creep up more often as time goes on. i suppose it is an eternal question, but it seems more political than spiritual to me. the idea of 'god' is important because those that search for something more than mere existence need the prologue to 'modern' life. my thing is this - why do we need 'Him'. i apologise for the apostrophes, but i feel as though we are constrained and caged by these definitions just as these apostrophes cage our words. i believe our existence to be more complicated and intricate than a myth about a man who came and shed his blood for all of humanity. i think that it is a beautiful story, but it is simplistic. i think that he had some good philosophies, but they don't scrape the surface of what is really going on. we are all at base mere energy - molecules bouncing off of each other - reacting to each other. this leads to my next point. the people who believe in these things believe that 'god' looks after them, protects them, and heals them. my argument is that these strong 'positive' beliefs are what looks after them, protects them, and heals them. i believe, that since we are all merely energy; our 'positive' or 'negative' existence attracts or deflects our future. to live and see in a positive way attracts positive options, but to do the opposite, achieves the opposite. i understand the 'think negatively to protect yourself' theory, but frankly, fuck that! i know that things are dark, and i know that the future is bleak, but i still refuse to think like that! i might be in a tunnel, but i don't focus on the water and the rats, i focus on that tiny bit of light at the end, and how i'm going to get there. i'm not spouting some new age hippy theory, but break everything down to the lowest common denominator - we are only a recipe of molecules... that's it! nothing more, nothing less. we are the same matter as this pc, as a piece of toast, as a weight of gold, or as a large glass of oil... umm... cough! cough! it's all the same. these are only my initial ideas for this subject, so feel free to criticise, for this is how we learn - being told that we are wrong... please give feedback! this is an idea that needs imput from those that are more knowledgeable in these areas than me. this is all very basic... i leave you with the words of our lord monty python... 'he's not the messiah! he's a very naughty boy!'